(no subject)

[paperclippy]

From thegreatgonz. Type your name and "needs" into google and post some results.

1. Jessica needs a bit of time off by herself to process things.
   How true, how true.
   
2. Jessica needs an adoptive family that is very structured.
   Considering I still have my biological family, I don't think I need an adoptive one.
   
3. jessica needs to keep her effin hands off my boy.
   ! Well, my goodness. I don't think I have my hands on anyone's boy.
   
4. Jessica needs a whole lot of timeout. Maybe someone stole her teddy bear when
   she was little and she out to get angry at the world for it.
   This was just too funny to not post the second sentence.
   
5. Jessica needs to get a kidney fast so she can live her life like she used to.
   Why are all the "needs" ones about people with illnesses? I'm skipping a bunch about "Jessica needs a wheelchair" and "Jessica needs a structured environment" and such.
   
6. Jessica needs to get high. Jessica needs drugs. Jessica needs cash.
   I could use some cash, after spending way too much on that haircut!
   
7. jessica needs to keep her mouth shut sometimes...
   True. Geez, everything that is not about disabled kids is about Jessica Simpson.
   
8. Jessica needs to free herself from 200 pounds of dead weight
   Funny on its own, but this is about that new movie "Into the Blue" where apparently Jessica Alba gets handcuffed to a dead man or something.
   
9. Jessica needs to be a prostitute for one night just to see how bad it really is.
   No thanks, I believe you.
   
10. Clearly Jessica needs her own reality tv series where a camera crew follows her
    around on her daily routine as she goes about normal everyday activities
    How much would they pay me?
    

Okay, that wasn't too exciting because everything is about famous people named Jessica or children who need adoption/transplants/donations/etc.